Dress Shopping

     I am going shopping with a friend today (see earlier post here). We are going into no-man's-land. Literally and proverbially. Seriously, no man alive would be caught dead doing what we are doing today. Shopping for a dress for the Mother of the Groom. In case you didn't know, the Mother of the Groom is the woman at the wedding with no official status. Tradition tells us that she is supposed to wear beige (I actually did at my second son's wedding!) and shut-up (I tried really hard to do this, but if you know me, you know that this was a nigh unto impossible task). I think my friend will be better at this than I was.
    The Mother of the Groom is the woman at the wedding who must take her cue from everyone else. Tradition also dictates that she cannot select her dress (length, style, or color) until the Mother of the Bride has selected hers, and she must also wait until the Bride gives her permission to go forward with this task. The MOG must also make discreet inquiries as to the style of the MOB's dress and must make sure that while her dress is similar in length, style, and fabric choice,  i.e., short, tea length, or long; sequins or no sequins; chiffon, silk, or satin, she can do NOTHING that would upstage the Mother of the Bride. Furthermore, she absolutely cannot COPY the Mother of the Bride, instead, she must delicately follow her lead.
   It's all about navigating the intrepid wedding waters with serenity, style, and grace. My friend should be fine. She has all three in spades. I did some online perusing today to get myself in the right frame of mind to accomplish this all important task. I discovered that there is quite a range of options out there. Some of them are literally mindblowing. Take a look at what I found!

This one definitely fits the traditional wear beige and shut-up category. It's a bit too frou frou for my friend.  

   This is for the semi-sporty Mother of the Groom. My friend doesn't fit this bill either. 

 This is for the Marrakesh Mother of the Bride. My friend doesn't like this trendy look. She's much more traditional. I bet she's also afraid that people might wonder what she is hiding under all those layers.

     I call this the VaVa Voom Mother of the Bride or what an aging cougar might wear. Nada on this one. My friend will not be showing any of her charms. I am glad. I don't want anyone in Texas thinking we Nashvillians have poor taste.

     Do you remember Uli on Project Runway? She might have designed this dress. I think it's a little too artsy for my friend. I don't think she would ever wear anything that looks like it had been tye-dyed, much less walk down the aisle in it!

     This dress actually caught my eye even though my friend will definitely not do strapless. She would have to fashion a little bolero of some kind. Then I noticed the price of the price of this dress. Gasp. Gasp again. $4,560. Are you kidding me? That might be more than she and her husband will be spending on the rehearsal dinner and the plane fares and the....you get the idea. Do people really pay those prices for a Mother of the Groom dress? I couldn't do it. And neither can my friend. Besides, I really don't like the dress that much. 

     On all the websites I checked out, I could not help but notice that all but one featured ultra thin glamorous looking models who might pass for a "mother" but only if the mother had been dieting religiously, getting Botox regularly, and was a child bride when she married the fantasy father. 

      I did manage to find one normal looking woman.

      But the problem is that she is wearing white. And everybody knows that there is only one person who gets to wear white to the wedding, and that is the BRIDE. 

      Oh well, we are off to laugh, to cry, make a few memories, and hopefully, find the PURFFFECT dress!