A Sweet Way to Remember a Loved One

   Death is no stranger to any of us. And if we have not yet suffered the loss of someone we love, it is inevitable that we will. Death has been a fact of life since Adam and Eve left the garden, and will be so until Jesus comes again. Even if we carry the surety of heaven in our hearts, the process of dying still gives us pause. When we bury someone that we love, we understand the fragility of life in a new and different way. As never before, we long for the day when death and dying shall be no more.

Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth for the old heaven and the old earth had passed away...

I heard a loud voice saying, God's dwelling place is now among the people

and God himself shall be with them...

He will wipe every tear from their eyes. 

There will be no more death, or mourning, or crying, or pain, 

for the old order of things has passed away. 

             From Revelation 21

    As a Christian, I am thankful to be of those who do not grieve without hope. Do Christians grieve? Absolutely! Yet the wonder is that the Holy Spirit miraculously keeps hope alive in our hearts. When we become believers, the hope of heaven is literally woven into the very fabric of our DNA. It cannot be denied. We may try, but hope works on us from the inside out, to bring us comfort, peace and a flicker of joy, even on the darkest of days. And so it is and has been with the Baby Sister.
     During the past two years, she and her husband, David, were an inspiration to me and many others, as against all odds, he chose life and fought hard and courageously to live each day on this earth that he had been given. When death finally came in July of this past year, David surrendered himself into the loving arms of His Savior and entered into the glory of life everlasting. Friends and family came near and far to cry, to weep, to rejoice, and to celebrate David Randell White's homegoing to heaven. My husband said it was the best funeral he had ever attended. It was hard, but it was good.
    My sister is keeping on with life since her husband passed away. I am sure that there are days when the depth of her loss takes her to her knees. And there are days when the grief of David's death is but a shadow that hovers and passes. Sometimes the nights are long and lonely and then there are times when she can sleep like a baby. Each day is different.
    The first holidays without a loved one can be especially difficult. The sense of loss is palpable. With Christmas coming, my sister came up with an idea for gifts for her children and grandchildren that would give them a tangible reminder of the father and grandfather they loved so much. Here is how it came about. In late summer when my sister began going through her husband's clothing, she found that there were several shirts that she was having a hard time parting with as they were a tangible reminder to her of her husband and of the special things he liked to do. There were his roping shirts (he was a team roper extraordinaire), his fishing shirts (he loved to flyfish and spend time on the Choctawhatchee Bay in his boat), his hunting shirts, his work shirts, his church shirts, and more. If you are getting the idea that this was a man who loved to spend time working outside enjoying God's marvelous creation, you would be right! David also loved to laugh, to sing, and as a man of great faith, he loved to worship the Lord with great freedom and joy. And even though he was a talented builder of note (one of his homes graced the cover of Coastal Living magazine), an incredible and creative problem solver, who was pragmatic, thrifty, and resourceful, he could be tough, if he needed to be. Yet David Randell White was a man with a great sense of humor, who loved his wife and his family and his Lord above all else. In short, he had the heart of a teddy bear. So the Baby Sister took his favorite shirts and made them into bears.
    One son loved to fish with his Dad, so his bear was made from a shirt he had seen his father wear when they fished together. One of the granddaughters loved nothing better than watching "Pa" roping his cows, so she was given a bear made from a roping shirt complete with a pocket with snaps. There was a bear with a camouflage look made from a hunting shirt, a soft flannel shirt oft worn became another favored bear. And the list went on. No two were alike. My sister had a bear made for herself out of a church shirt because some of her favorite memories were of standing beside her husband as they worshipped the Lord together. One special touch is that there are bears set aside for grandchildren yet to be born. 
   My sister's found a wonderful way to remember her husband. It's an idea that David would definitely appreciate. He would be glad that the shirts are no longer hanging unused in the closet!
    And from what I understand, on Christmas Day my sister's home was filled with lots of laughter coupled with the shedding of sweet tears. I'm pretty sure that was the case on both sides of heaven. 

 Here is the tag that accompanied each bear. My sister designed it and included a very special scripture that meant a great deal to her and her husband.

      It's a simple gift. Nothing too fancy and nothing too fine. Just a bear made out of an old shirt that belonged to someone they loved. A sweet way of remembering, wouldn't you agree?

The Big Reveal

    In the modern era, it is more common than not for couples to find out the gender of their baby before the birth occurs. It was not even an option for The Husband and me in three of my pregnancies and by the time we got to our fourth, we already had two boys and a girl, so finding out the sex of the baby beforehand was not of prime importance. In my own case, I can readily testify that learning whether you have given birth to a boy or girl at the moment of delivery is possibly the most wonderful surprise in life. However, today it seems that the vast majority of couples want to know ahead of time. And since technological advances have given us a window into the womb, if my children choose to find out the gender of their baby and are willing to share the news with us, then I am more than happy to forego the element of surprise.
   My eldest son and daughter-in-law planned a "gender reveal" for us the week before Christmas that proved to be a lot of fun. The plan was for both immediate families, his and hers, to gather at our house and enjoy a meal together. After the meal, my daughter-in-law promised that we would soon learn whether the grandbaby would be a boy or a girl.
    Here's how it played out. The two grandmothers had the honor of cutting the delicious homemade cake which contained a surprise. You can tell that we are just a wee bit excited.

 Those are the parents-to-be standing by to see our reaction.

In case you are wondering, we can't really tell anything yet...

 I'm still in the dark here...

 Can you tell that the other grandmother has figured it out?! I love her joy.

 Ahh...there is the proof. Our grandbaby will be a BOY!

I am hoping that May will get here sooner than later. 

I can't wait to meet this precious little one.

There are also some other little people in our family 

who are eagerly awaiting the arrival 

of a new cousin.

However, I think the biggest attraction that night was the idea of getting to eat some cake!

Recapping the moment!

Momma-to-be with her Momma!

The granddaddy-to-be and his girl!

Momma-to-be and her siblings!

The Daddy-to-be and his siblings sans one son-in-law...

And finally, here's the lovely couple with both sets of grandparents!

No matter the number of grandchildren, the joy is the same. Love has a marvelous
way of multiplying itself like a cup running over with the addition to the family of each little one.
We feel so very blessed.
I am mindful of the scripture I prayed before this first-born son of ours came into the world,
For this child I prayed and the Lord hath granted me the petition
I made unto Him, therefore, as long as he lives, he shall be given unto the Lord.
May it be so with the life of this little one.

Acts of Kindness

     A hospital is a study in contrasts. As a place of employment, it is a bustling place that never sleeps. While nighttime does bring an ebb and flow of sorts, the siren's wail, the beep and whir of endless machines, and the quiet voices of the nurses and technicians as they move about the hallways remind one that the business of caring for human life in its various stages forms the crux and the impetus for the hospital.
    The waiting rooms are filled with another kind of energy. The weariness on the faces of those who shift uncomfortably in already uncomfortable chairs does little to disguise the tension and emotion that simmer beneath the surface. When the phone rings and a volunteer announces a family, you can feel the room rise, shift, and settle much like a wave in a football stadium. Sometimes the waiting seems interminable and the passage of time moves at a snail's pace. I am glad that I am not there today. Waiting in a hospital can be a difficult thing. But not today; thankfully, not today.


   Today I am thinking that I am especially thankful for the tender mercies and kindness of health professionals: physicians, nurses, technicians and volunteers...for care given that moves beyond competence to become compassion. For hands that move with skill coupled with gentleness. For the willingness to see each patient as an individual with unique and special attributes in addition to his or her medical needs. So often the medical issue seems to dominate, but the gifted health professional has the wisdom to see beyond the need of the person to the person with the need.
   I have spent some time in hospitals recently. Either as a patient myself or alongside someone who was receiving medical care. The kindness of those who care does make a difference. Today as I prayed, I found this meditation by Teresa of Avila tucked in a page in my Bible. I offer it to all those who labor in hospitals to make a difference in the life of someone in their care. May you be blessed in your endeavors.

May today there be peace within.
May you trust God that you are exactly where you are meant to be.
May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith.
May you use those gifts that you have received, and pass on the love that has been given to you.
May you be content knowing that you are a child of God.
Let His presence settle into your bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise
and love.
It is there for each and every one of you.
  Teresa of Avila

Christmas Treasures

   The best gifts of Christmas are those you treasure in your heart. It's the moment when a child comes into a room with wide eyes and the biggest grin you have ever seen as she spies the gifts awaiting her under the tree. It's the unexpected bear hug from a tall son who also stoops to whisper, "I love you, Momma," into your listening ear. It's the quiet hubbub of little voices rising and the mothers' gently shushing them as Pappy reads aloud the timeless Christmas Story from Luke 2. It's the laughter around the dinner table. It's the grandchildren peering through the staircase spindles where once your own children pressed their faces in nearly the same way.  It's a granddaddy who rescues a squalling baby and whisks him away to a quiet room where it's just the two of them sharing a moment of precious peace.
   I count myself as one blessed woman. No Christmas is ever perfect, because we are an imperfect people in great need of that Holy One who came to earth on that fateful night so long ago. The real miracle of Christmas is not even the treasured memories we collect and carefully document in order to remember. It is undeserved grace poured out from heaven above. Grace for sinners such as you and I. It is a baby born to die. It is sins forgiven, negated, absolved and remembered no more. It is freedom. It is mercy that finds itself renewed every morning by the power of that majestic giver of all grace, Emmanuel, God With Us.

Getting ready for the celebration.
A lovely banner ordered here on Etsy and a caramel cake from the

incomparable Leland Riggin of Dessert Designs

The calm before the storm

All set and ready to go

And here they come

Say cheese, please!

And what to my wondering eyes should appear...

 "I don't know about you, but I am going straight for the glass slippers..."

 Nonna and the boys!

Things are getting crazy around here

 The girls' sleeping bags are a great hit!

Let's try them out in the teepee

 Good idea

Brother wants to get in on the action.
Note the matching socks. Not.

This guy is happy happy happy with his new book

Nothin' like a boy and his truck (and a few dinosaurs)

Hey, when do we eat? 

Uncle Bear and I are getting hungry...

While no one is looking, I'm gonna finish up the last of this spinach dip...

The girls feel special at their own little table

And then it gets a little crazy

 The aftermath

 Whew...now it's time to chill out, and let the food digest while the grandbabes watch a little Sound of Music

 And the adults open their stockings...

 
 Am I dreaming or is this room getting smaller
and smaller and smaller?!

 Pappy has found the perfect quiet hideout...in the teepee...with the grandchildren!

Then it's time for everyone to head home and put their sleepyheads to bed.
Merry Christmas to all and to all a Good Night!

The Husband's Christmas Letter 2013

   

     The Husband works for an incredible organization, Pinnacle Bank, that allows him the freedom to send his Christmas reflection to all 750 bank employees each year. It is a special gift that he does not take lightly. I look forward each year to reading what he has written. This letter really pierced my heart. Here is this year's letter sent the week before Christmas! Read it and you'll see why I love this man so much.

Christmas Blessing 2013

As we once again approach that joyful time of the year, Christmas, I want to challenge and encourage us to contemplate two aspects of this most extraordinary day in the history of the world.  First, I challenge you to really ponder why and how we celebrate Christmas and the indescribable joy which it should represent to us , and secondly, something upon which we rarely focus in our celebration – the three Wise Men and what they should represent to us.

With regards to this particular day, to me unquestionably Christmas is the most important day in the history of the world and reflects the greatest news ever given to mankind.  The baby’s birth in the manger was the fulfillment of Old Testament prophecy:  Isaiah 9:6 – “ For us a child is born, to us a Son is given. And He will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace  “and to the shepherds in the field an angel proclaimed in Luke 2:9:  “I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all people. Today in the town of David, a Savior has been born to you, He is Christ the Lord. “  Through this day, there are several poignant messages given which we should recognize and claim.  First and most importantly – God loves you.  This love He has for you encapsulates His nature, for in His very essence God is love.  Secondly, God is with you:  Jesus is actually named “Emmanuel” which means “God with us."  Thirdly, God is for you – He wants you to succeed in the things that are truly important.  He desires a vibrant relationship with you – If not, why would He have sent His Son to be with us except to relate with us – not to judge the world but instead to love it and save it.

Let’s not forget the Prodigal Son story in which the father runs out to greet the returning wayward son who had previously abandoned his family.  THAT is the story of Christmas.  It is the Father who runs to greet us in the form of a babe. The Bible clearly states that we were all destined for eternal death in sin but God did not turn His head on us, but instead sent His Son to be with us and ultimately to be the vehicle through whom we can be reunited with Him forever.  Is there anything of greater value to be celebrated?  Life is tough – in fact very tough. Our lives resonate with poor choices; friends disappointing us; family trials; divorce; business failures; debilitating health conditions; deep suffering, separation, and even death. At some point some or all of these are a part of each of our lives.  HOWEVER, Christmas is that good news of great joy which is for everyone who chooses to accept the gift, such that we have something of God's own eternal nature coupled with the power of a heartfelt joy which can supersede and even conquer the temporary circumstances which cause us great unhappiness and anxiety. Through our Lord we now have access to that peace which surpasses all understanding.

You see, a major part of the “Good News” of Christmas is that YOU matter to God.  He knows everything about us – the good, the bad, and the ugly – and He still loves us.  We are not an accident – He has a plan and purpose of life for each of us.  Christmas is God’s chosen time.  It is not about religion, for Jesus did not come to bring us a religion,  but instead He came to bring us a relationship – the opportunity to know Him; love Him; accept Him as Lord; and be forever reunited with Him.  God sent Jesus to us as the most extraordinary gift possible so we could know what He is like.  God did not want us to love him from a distance but instead desired to love us up close.

Now as to the Wise Men, far too infrequently do we place any emphasis upon them and scrutinize exactly who they were  and why they are important to us.  The Wise Men were part of a totally different culture. They are fascinating people. Certainly in the manger, they looked out of place with their fancy clothes and gifts.  The Bible refers to them as “Magi” – quite wealthy and highly educated – a combination of philosophers, scientists, and astronomers.  They were also seekers of the truth.  In Matthew 2:2 they ask:  “Where is the baby who was born to be the King of the Jews?”  They wanted to worship Him.  They were willing to go to any length to find Jesus – to come from the Far East to the Middle East in Bethlehem to find Him – to embark on a four to five month (or possibly longer) journey across a scorching hot desert to find Him.  All the major religious leaders of the world were basically right there in Jerusalem,  only six miles from Bethlehem,  but none of them were seeking Jesus.

Can you imagine what it must have been like when the Magi first saw the baby Jesus?  He looked to be just another baby in a dirty manger, yet they knew immediately that He was the King of Kings and Lord of Lords.  They experienced such depth of emotion that they stopped in awe and fell on their faces to worship Him.  Also, remember what these Wise Men did next – they gave Him gifts as part of their worship – gifts representing their very best – gold; myrrh; and frankincense.  They bowed down and gave Him their treasures.

So the question for you and me is:  “What will we give Him?” 

Will we give Him our trust?  Will we give Him first place in our life so that nothing robs Him of that place? Will we look at those things which quite frankly represent idols disrupting our relationship with God?  Will we give Him our Heart?  In that most special place of our heart is what we love; what we most deeply value; those things about which we care the most.  Will we share our love for Him with others?   Will we be seekers of Truth like the Wise Men?  And most importantly, as with the Wise Men, will we give Him our best – not simply our leftovers but instead our very best?  Do you ever contemplate that just maybe God wants a present from us?  Jesus said that the Kingdom of Heaven is like a pearl so valuable that one would sell everything and anything to obtain it.

So the difference in giving our present to God -  our most valuable treasure – our Heart – we immediately get something back in return even more valuable – what a deal!!  The best ever of which I have heard!! We are never to be separated from Him. 

So this December 25^th, I wish for you a most special and blessed Christmas – knowing how much God loves you; how He is with you regardless of present, past, or future circumstances; how in His omnipresence and omniscience He is always watching you and always for you.  I pray that we all will give Him our very best and most precious treasure such that we will enjoy Him, not simply at Christmas, but for all eternity. 

MERRY  CHRISTMAS!

Ed White

O'er Hill and Vale

   The first snow of the season. A mere dusting. Not enough to sneeze about except that the thin crust of ice on the roads at 6 am sent more than a few drivers slip-sliding over bridges and a semi or two bumping into those careening cars. It was won and done. School was out for the day.
    The Daughter lives in a neighborhood in East Nashville where neighbors holler out across porches, join each other for impromptu dinner parties, and know the vagaries of one another's lives. So today it was time to rally the kiddos and head out for the slopes. The slopes being the Shelby Golf Course, of course.
     Here's what happened along the way. No commentary necessary.